Current tunes: The Script (got their cd from the library and CANNOT stop playing it.)
Plans for the evening: Reading, reading, and more reading. Maybe watch a film.
Current excitement: Ummmm... errrr... NEXT WEEKEND, woot.
So hey. I know it's been awhile. A weekish? Sorry for that. I can't explain it.
First off, HOLY CRAP, SARAH TURNER, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, I LOVE YOU TO A MILLION TINY PIECES. Mmm.
My baby is 18 today. Which makes me reflexively nostalgic. I remember daydreaming with her about turning 18, and how fabulous it would be to have so much freedom. We were so different back then. Man. I fell in love with this girl in eighth grade, and she's been by my side ever since. I never thought I was worth a best friend who would stick around, but she proved me wrong. I am a lucky, lucky lady to know and love Sarah Turner. I wish you the best, baby! And someday I will write a song just for you, princess.
So whew, this week has been such a rolleerrrrcoaster. I've been spending a lot of time in my thoughts, which could be either a good or a bad thing, depending what's occupying my mind. There are a lot of things I'd like to change about my life, things I need to work on, things I need to work harder on, and things I need to say goodbye to once and for all. I'm excited to move into my sister's old room in a week or so, because I feel like being in a new environment (ie the basement) will change my perspective. Does that make sense? (She asks the great wide silence).
Today I learned some things about my old youth group, which reminded me why it's my OLD youth group. But boy, do I have a lot of opinions about it. I guess I need a good reminder that not everyone sees things my way. And it's not my place to try and fix something that doesn't even concern me. But I feel really upset about it. I just wish that that youth group could be more like the one I fell in love with the summer after seventh grade, when my life began in earnest. I guess the best I can do is just pray about it, and hope that God takes control of the various situations, relationships, and dynamics. Because in the end, that's what youth group should be about. Not socializing, not controlling young minds, not competing, playing games, or giving them somewhere to be. It needs to be about Jesus Christ, the singular saviour. If you can get to the root of that, to the root of that love, then you're golden, and your petty grudges, power struggles, and minor differences will melt away into the light of His glory. Just stop being unfocused. There are bigger things to worry about than you. [Sarah, I am really, really proud of you.]
This school week will be tough, because I've got a few quizzes and projects due. But as long as I stay on top of things, I'm sure I'll be fine. I just wish I could spend more time with Him. It's so stupid, in light of who He is, but when I get stressed, it always seems that the first thing to go is time with Him. And sometimes I sit before Him, and I feel like I simply can't speak the words that should be spoken. I need some Relient K really bad about now. I'm such a girl.
But God hasn't backed down in His "My Creation is Beautiful" campaign. Have you SEEN the moon tonight?!?!? And the sunsets... glorious. Somehow, driving in that fading sunlight makes me feel like I've got it all under control. But really it's God pulling the strings, for which I'm so, so, SO thankful. I would drown without Him.
My prayer for you tonight comes from Ephesians 4:17b and on, "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have the power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
Okay, I'm off to get a jump start on my homework. Love to you, whoever you are!
<3
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
In which I illuminate Hosea 2
Current Tunes: Laura Hackett
Plans for the evening: a Michael Cera film in bed.
Current excitement: ....sleeping?
Hola all. Oldest sister informed me on Sunday that because I tagged people in my FB note about this blog, my privacy settings were disregarded and all sorts of creepers had a look. (Creepers like my family, incidentally). So now I feel less inhibited. But I'll try to get over that.
Today was stuuuuupid. I didn't get much sleep last night. I'm convinced that I am 80 years old and have arthritis, and as a result I kept waking up in the middle of the night with a VERY PAINFUL shoulder. I'm dying. Jokejokejoke. Anyways. And Soc was stupid because we got put into our groups... and I hate group work... And then I tried to nap, but it hurt too much and left me groggy. Then I did have a nice time reading with Sadie and writing a paper for school. But then... wooooorrrrk. Blah. And home to grog through some Japanese literature. Akutagawa, if anyone's interested. And excerpts from the Tale of Genji, which is hilarious, because he's suuuuuch a playa. Not a beach. I mean a playeR. Mackin' on womenlike.
Anyways, so this song reminded me of one of my faaaavorite passages in the Bible today, so I will share both contigo.
"Beautiful Mercy" by Laura Hackett:
"And He's brought me to the wilderness where I will learn to sing. And He lets me know my barrenness so that I can learn to lead. There is no pit too deep that Jesus cannot reach. There is no sorrow so strong that would overtake His beloved one."
Here's the accompanying scripture, taken from Hosea 2 in an NIV Bible...Starting at verse 14:
"Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor (meaning trouble) a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth, as in the day she came up out of Egypt.
'In that day,' declares the LORD, 'you will call me "my husband"; you will no longer call me "my master." ' "
Later in verse 19....
"I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness and you will acknowledge the Lord."
SO. There's a TON of stuff I could say about this passage, but because I hope to maintain your interest, I'll try to keep it short. I really encourage you to read this whole chapter, and whole book on your own, because there's loads of good stuff in there that can be applied to both our personal walks with God and our nation's actions.
The idea in verse 14 pretty much that God needs to take us away from what we know and love, away from our comfort zones and our support systems for us to even begin to truly trust in Him. Hence, He leads us into the desert place, where we are made to face our barrenness. He calls us out of lush valleys to a place of brokenness, loneliness, and despair. But it is here in this place of emptiness that He whispers TENDERLY to us, "I love you, I am with you always. Trust me, I know what I'm doing."
This verse, Hosea 2:14, is up on my whiteboard and posted on my wall by my bed. It reminds me that through all those times when I felt desperate for anything to hold onto, God had a plan. Yes, I've lost a lot, hurt a lot, and cried a lot. But through these broken times, I learned what it really meant to crawl back to Him, to rely on Him 100%, and to trust that He will bless me through the brokenness.
And the next verse, verse 15, promises us those blessings. He says that there in that desert place, He will restore our beauty, our comforts, our glory. "There she will sing as in the days of her youth." AHHH God is good! I tear up every time I read that part of the verse because of my own path with music and singing. But that story's enough for an entire entry on its own.
Basically, God has brought me through a desert place, and through the trials, temptations, and sheer agony, He has shown me a tender love unlike anything I've ever known in my life. He is the oasis in the desert, the deep well of abundance in the barren place. Drink deeply, my loves.
Whew. I talk waaay too much and only ever say half of what I mean to.
<3
Plans for the evening: a Michael Cera film in bed.
Current excitement: ....sleeping?
Hola all. Oldest sister informed me on Sunday that because I tagged people in my FB note about this blog, my privacy settings were disregarded and all sorts of creepers had a look. (Creepers like my family, incidentally). So now I feel less inhibited. But I'll try to get over that.
Today was stuuuuupid. I didn't get much sleep last night. I'm convinced that I am 80 years old and have arthritis, and as a result I kept waking up in the middle of the night with a VERY PAINFUL shoulder. I'm dying. Jokejokejoke. Anyways. And Soc was stupid because we got put into our groups... and I hate group work... And then I tried to nap, but it hurt too much and left me groggy. Then I did have a nice time reading with Sadie and writing a paper for school. But then... wooooorrrrk. Blah. And home to grog through some Japanese literature. Akutagawa, if anyone's interested. And excerpts from the Tale of Genji, which is hilarious, because he's suuuuuch a playa. Not a beach. I mean a playeR. Mackin' on womenlike.
Anyways, so this song reminded me of one of my faaaavorite passages in the Bible today, so I will share both contigo.
"Beautiful Mercy" by Laura Hackett:
"And He's brought me to the wilderness where I will learn to sing. And He lets me know my barrenness so that I can learn to lead. There is no pit too deep that Jesus cannot reach. There is no sorrow so strong that would overtake His beloved one."
Here's the accompanying scripture, taken from Hosea 2 in an NIV Bible...Starting at verse 14:
"Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor (meaning trouble) a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth, as in the day she came up out of Egypt.
'In that day,' declares the LORD, 'you will call me "my husband"; you will no longer call me "my master." ' "
Later in verse 19....
"I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness and you will acknowledge the Lord."
SO. There's a TON of stuff I could say about this passage, but because I hope to maintain your interest, I'll try to keep it short. I really encourage you to read this whole chapter, and whole book on your own, because there's loads of good stuff in there that can be applied to both our personal walks with God and our nation's actions.
The idea in verse 14 pretty much that God needs to take us away from what we know and love, away from our comfort zones and our support systems for us to even begin to truly trust in Him. Hence, He leads us into the desert place, where we are made to face our barrenness. He calls us out of lush valleys to a place of brokenness, loneliness, and despair. But it is here in this place of emptiness that He whispers TENDERLY to us, "I love you, I am with you always. Trust me, I know what I'm doing."
This verse, Hosea 2:14, is up on my whiteboard and posted on my wall by my bed. It reminds me that through all those times when I felt desperate for anything to hold onto, God had a plan. Yes, I've lost a lot, hurt a lot, and cried a lot. But through these broken times, I learned what it really meant to crawl back to Him, to rely on Him 100%, and to trust that He will bless me through the brokenness.
And the next verse, verse 15, promises us those blessings. He says that there in that desert place, He will restore our beauty, our comforts, our glory. "There she will sing as in the days of her youth." AHHH God is good! I tear up every time I read that part of the verse because of my own path with music and singing. But that story's enough for an entire entry on its own.
Basically, God has brought me through a desert place, and through the trials, temptations, and sheer agony, He has shown me a tender love unlike anything I've ever known in my life. He is the oasis in the desert, the deep well of abundance in the barren place. Drink deeply, my loves.
Whew. I talk waaay too much and only ever say half of what I mean to.
<3
Saturday, February 20, 2010
In which I elaborate on sweetness
Current Tunes: Nataly Dawn
Plans por la noche: edit, read, vegetate.... So thrilling.
Current excitement: Going to Target tomorrow!
Helloooooo mateys. I was saying to Kendra yesterday that I feel awkward, because I don't know who's reading this, or if anyone is. Soooo............ Hey.
I sure am loooooving this semester. It's so chillax. And, esp. now that I'm off FB, I feel like I have spare time to drown in. Part of me feels like a loser, because I should be running about, being involved in activities, hanging out with friends, so on and so forth. But then I realize that for a very, very long time I have been a crazy busy bee. So a month or two of living in a lull does not make me a loser. Nope. And now I have time for things I want to do, ie purge my room, read excessively, attend worship meetings, keep a blog (!) and see people that I have missed. AND having spare time means I can keep up with my classes this semester and not fall apart like last time!
So that is how I feel.
The Holy Spirit word of the week(s) has been "sweet," with an offshoot of "tender." I feel like God, in allowing me these solid hours of free time, has been drowning me with life's sweetness. I swear He's just showering my life with beauty. I've seen the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets this week. And oh, the other day flocks of birds over the highway. Gorgeous. And yesterday leaving Bethel, I was struck by the silent dignity of the leafless trees, huddled close together. God knows I have a photographer's eye, so He sends me these images for my memory's photo albums. I feel like all this beauty I've been seeing lately has just been God reminding me that He hasn't forgotten me- He remembers me here and showers His love over me.
As a result, I've been "devouring the sweetness of life." Every moment holds beauty- whether it's a calm drive home from work, fifteen extra minutes in the morning, a beautiful song, a breathtaking verse, or my nephew smiling at me. And all this beauty comes from the Creator. So thank you, Jesus, for what you have given me. Mmmlife and living.
So last night Kenny Lendra and I went to check out Generation Revival (?) as a part of Twin Cities House of Prayer (hereafter referred to as TCHOP) at the Roseville campus of North Heights (which my grandpa helped build!). The worship team from Concordia Academy was leading so that was great; they're faaaantastic. I think both Ken and I really enjoyed it. Jesus and I enjoyed re-getting to know each other, I think. I kept being fascinated at how Jesus is the lover of my soul, but more on that in another post, I think. Anyways, it was a precious time, and if you're ever looking for something to do 9-midnightish on a Friday night, there you go.
So the verses for today come from Colossians 3, specifically verses 1-4, though the whole chapter's GREAT.
From NIV, "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things about, not earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you will also appear with him in glory."
My favorite part is the last verse which says "Christ, who is your life.." I just love that idea, that we died with him and will rise again with him when he comes back for the wedding, and that until then, we're called to live Christ-centered lives. We're not simply Christians in theory... But our Saviour is meant to be the very core of our beings; he should be our focus in every aspect of life- school, relationships, driving, meals, finances, working, reading, looooving. It's aaaall about Him. Remember that!!
Okay. Love to you dear hearts. Until next time.
<3
Plans por la noche: edit, read, vegetate.... So thrilling.
Current excitement: Going to Target tomorrow!
Helloooooo mateys. I was saying to Kendra yesterday that I feel awkward, because I don't know who's reading this, or if anyone is. Soooo............ Hey.
I sure am loooooving this semester. It's so chillax. And, esp. now that I'm off FB, I feel like I have spare time to drown in. Part of me feels like a loser, because I should be running about, being involved in activities, hanging out with friends, so on and so forth. But then I realize that for a very, very long time I have been a crazy busy bee. So a month or two of living in a lull does not make me a loser. Nope. And now I have time for things I want to do, ie purge my room, read excessively, attend worship meetings, keep a blog (!) and see people that I have missed. AND having spare time means I can keep up with my classes this semester and not fall apart like last time!
So that is how I feel.
The Holy Spirit word of the week(s) has been "sweet," with an offshoot of "tender." I feel like God, in allowing me these solid hours of free time, has been drowning me with life's sweetness. I swear He's just showering my life with beauty. I've seen the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets this week. And oh, the other day flocks of birds over the highway. Gorgeous. And yesterday leaving Bethel, I was struck by the silent dignity of the leafless trees, huddled close together. God knows I have a photographer's eye, so He sends me these images for my memory's photo albums. I feel like all this beauty I've been seeing lately has just been God reminding me that He hasn't forgotten me- He remembers me here and showers His love over me.
As a result, I've been "devouring the sweetness of life." Every moment holds beauty- whether it's a calm drive home from work, fifteen extra minutes in the morning, a beautiful song, a breathtaking verse, or my nephew smiling at me. And all this beauty comes from the Creator. So thank you, Jesus, for what you have given me. Mmmlife and living.
So last night Kenny Lendra and I went to check out Generation Revival (?) as a part of Twin Cities House of Prayer (hereafter referred to as TCHOP) at the Roseville campus of North Heights (which my grandpa helped build!). The worship team from Concordia Academy was leading so that was great; they're faaaantastic. I think both Ken and I really enjoyed it. Jesus and I enjoyed re-getting to know each other, I think. I kept being fascinated at how Jesus is the lover of my soul, but more on that in another post, I think. Anyways, it was a precious time, and if you're ever looking for something to do 9-midnightish on a Friday night, there you go.
So the verses for today come from Colossians 3, specifically verses 1-4, though the whole chapter's GREAT.
From NIV, "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things about, not earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you will also appear with him in glory."
My favorite part is the last verse which says "Christ, who is your life.." I just love that idea, that we died with him and will rise again with him when he comes back for the wedding, and that until then, we're called to live Christ-centered lives. We're not simply Christians in theory... But our Saviour is meant to be the very core of our beings; he should be our focus in every aspect of life- school, relationships, driving, meals, finances, working, reading, looooving. It's aaaall about Him. Remember that!!
Okay. Love to you dear hearts. Until next time.
<3
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
In which I digress
Tunes: Monsters of Folk
Evening plans: Bones with sunflower seeds
Current excitement: working on Kendra's senior pictures- they're GORGEOUS.
So here's the story on this blog.
Today I went to chapel with Matt (Wednesdays are Soulmate days). I didn't know it was Ash Wednesday until it was mentioned at the beginning of service, which just goes to show how often I look at my calendar. I never really understood the meaning or implication of Ash Wednesday, but today my interest was piqued. The speaker (I'll try to remember her name...) spoke on the different things God says when He speaks to us and it was really, really helpful for me.
During our quiet reflection time, I felt a strong urging from the Holy Spirit towards two things: A) that I give up Facebook for Lent and B) that I start a blog, because He gives me a lot of stuff to say.
Giving up FB for 40 days will be difficult, but rewarding. Giving stuff up for Lent shouldn't be like... "What would I miss the least?" or "What is the healthiest option?" It's about giving up the biggest thing hindering your relationship with God. And for me at this point, it's Facebook, because it sucks up my time and lifeforce. Time that I should be spending with God. So there's that. I'll go on to upload some pictures, but that's about it. If I use it at all, it won't be for more than five minutes. In correlation to this, I'm going to be making a strong effort to read some Christian literature, to attend more prayer/worship meetings, and spend A LOT more time in prayer.
And the blogging... Well, for a large part, this is all for meeeeee! To keep me accountable in my walk with Christ, to help me remember what I do from day to day, and to help me empty my head of recurring thoughts. But for the few of you who may be interested, it's a chance to get inside my head and live my days with me. Good luck keeping up. ;D I'll try to share interesting/important Bible verses, quotes, photos, lyrics, or videos each time I blog....
So all that aside (sorry for droning on, I tend to be long-winded), here's the first thing I'd like to share with you:
The verse behind the name of my blog, taken from an NIV Bible, goes "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
This is Romans 8:37-39. These verses jumped out at me during my reading of Romans a few months back. Just the strong claim that NOTHING can separate us from His love, if we crave it, ask for it, and accept it. I've sinned loads in my life, like any other human being. And oftentimes, the Deceiver will try to convince me that God doesn't love me, want me, or think of me. Darlings, that is a lie straight from the pit of Hell. DESPITE our sins, our shortcomings, our failures, HE LOVES US. Endlessly, hopelessly, desperately, perfectly. For eternity.
Soak that up, pumpkins. That's all for tonight. Please enjoy my life, because I AM!
<3
Evening plans: Bones with sunflower seeds
Current excitement: working on Kendra's senior pictures- they're GORGEOUS.
So here's the story on this blog.
Today I went to chapel with Matt (Wednesdays are Soulmate days). I didn't know it was Ash Wednesday until it was mentioned at the beginning of service, which just goes to show how often I look at my calendar. I never really understood the meaning or implication of Ash Wednesday, but today my interest was piqued. The speaker (I'll try to remember her name...) spoke on the different things God says when He speaks to us and it was really, really helpful for me.
During our quiet reflection time, I felt a strong urging from the Holy Spirit towards two things: A) that I give up Facebook for Lent and B) that I start a blog, because He gives me a lot of stuff to say.
Giving up FB for 40 days will be difficult, but rewarding. Giving stuff up for Lent shouldn't be like... "What would I miss the least?" or "What is the healthiest option?" It's about giving up the biggest thing hindering your relationship with God. And for me at this point, it's Facebook, because it sucks up my time and lifeforce. Time that I should be spending with God. So there's that. I'll go on to upload some pictures, but that's about it. If I use it at all, it won't be for more than five minutes. In correlation to this, I'm going to be making a strong effort to read some Christian literature, to attend more prayer/worship meetings, and spend A LOT more time in prayer.
And the blogging... Well, for a large part, this is all for meeeeee! To keep me accountable in my walk with Christ, to help me remember what I do from day to day, and to help me empty my head of recurring thoughts. But for the few of you who may be interested, it's a chance to get inside my head and live my days with me. Good luck keeping up. ;D I'll try to share interesting/important Bible verses, quotes, photos, lyrics, or videos each time I blog....
So all that aside (sorry for droning on, I tend to be long-winded), here's the first thing I'd like to share with you:
The verse behind the name of my blog, taken from an NIV Bible, goes "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
This is Romans 8:37-39. These verses jumped out at me during my reading of Romans a few months back. Just the strong claim that NOTHING can separate us from His love, if we crave it, ask for it, and accept it. I've sinned loads in my life, like any other human being. And oftentimes, the Deceiver will try to convince me that God doesn't love me, want me, or think of me. Darlings, that is a lie straight from the pit of Hell. DESPITE our sins, our shortcomings, our failures, HE LOVES US. Endlessly, hopelessly, desperately, perfectly. For eternity.
Soak that up, pumpkins. That's all for tonight. Please enjoy my life, because I AM!
<3
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